Dear Sam, My friend from high school has decided that she wants to enjoy herself in ways that really don't have much quality. She sees my life going well and asks why her life can't be like mine. I want to tell her the truth that its because she's doing things […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam, I've had some hard and painful experiences in my life, but always prided myself on how resilient and positive I am. Lately, I've realized that I'm much more injured and pessimistic than I had thought. It feels like all the threads of sorrow have meshed together and are […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam,   I’m stuck in the middle of my divorced parents’ refusal to realize that they each have their own separate lives now. My mom won’t come to Christmas dinner without her new boyfriend, and dad won’t come if mom doesn’t come alone. My siblings are putting pressure on […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam,   I look around and see all kinds of people in relationships that keep them from being alone and deprived. I look at myself and wonder why I can’t have that. There is nothing particularly wrong with me in intelligence or looks or decency, but apparently no one […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam,   No matter how hard I try I just can’t succeed. I’m better at my job than my co-workers, but they are the ones who are liked by the boss. I put everything into my marriage, but my husband will not appreciate it. My children (grown) resent me although […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam,   I am so guilty all the time. I’m not even sure what it is that I do so wrong, but no matter what, I blame myself and feel awful. I’ve confessed known sins, I’ve gotten absolution, I pray to God all the time. But no relief. I canrsquo;t […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam,   Whenever I am in a new social situation I just freeze up. I don’t know what to say or do. I’ve turned down invitations because of this and I’m sick of being so inept. What can I do to improve this area of my life?   -Becoming a Hermit […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam,   My boyfriend and I are going through a hard time. He is accusing me of being a perfectionist, as if that were bad and wrong. Yes, I do want things to be done properly and in an orderly way. If they were, problems would disappear. Instead, he wants […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam,   My married children don’t take their children to church like I used to. It seems that religion is not included in their lives at all. What can I do to convince them that church attendance is important?    -Worried- Dear Worried,   This letter could have been written by […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam,   What’s happening when you can’t figure out a problem in a relationship? I know that the Holy Spirit’s job is to teach us everything we need to know, so am I not listening? Now I have two problems - the situation itself, and my inability to hear God […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam,   A couple of weeks ago you talked about God’s plan for a person’s life. That’s all religious, but what if I can’t or don’t want to do that plan. I don’t want my free will and personality to be smothered by some divine demand. I want to […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam,   My family is church-going, but I’ve begun to notice that they really don’t do anything that God’s Word says. They still drink, gossip, tell lies, yell and scream at each other. This doesn’t make sense to me. I’m starting to try to act the way God says […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam,   So many times your answers say that God has a plan. Fine and good, but what kind of freedom is that for me? And what if I can’t figure out that plan? Sounds like some kind of religious mumbo-jumbo. God’s plan certainly isn’t doing much for our […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam,   My boyfriend and I had been together for four years when he decided that he was not ready to commit, so I called it quits. I think I was right, but here it is a year later and not a day goes by that I don’t think […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam,   I’m beginning to understand the reason that we are supposed to be thankful in all circumstances. I realize that my critical and cynical attitude colours my perception so that even good things are tinged with mud. But, I don’t want to be fake. How can I put […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam,   What is the meaning of life, anyway? I try my best to be good, and it all turns out wrong. I know that religion says that life is for discovering God, but I can’t find him, and if I did, he would just yell at me like […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam,   It seemed that I needed to connect to a group that could provide a positive and helpful atmosphere in my life. So I joined a church that met these requirements. But after a couple of years the people have become less helpful, and they are putting pressure […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam,   Tell me - am I a bad person whenever I let my husband know that something is bothering me? I try to take responsibility for my own feelings and make every effort to approach him respectfully, but then he says that I am just trying to make […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam,   My husband is improving and I’m so mad. He was a real jerk and after being seriously sick he has calmed down, doesn’t yell, and tries to be decent to me. Everyone thinks he’s just great now, but I know what he put me through. He never […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam,   I have a friend with whom I get along well, except that we have never really been able to express any kind of anger or displeasure. As I learn more about honest relationships, I wonder if I should limit my time with her, since this doesn’t seem […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam,    It seems that our whole household is just one big chaotic jumble,. So I decided that I would begin to bring a quieting atmosphere into my home by speaking more softly and kindly, making sure that I keep the living area neat and tidy, bake more cookies […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam,    I want to become a better person, but I don’t even know what that means. I just have this feeling that if I could stop procrastinating and do better at my job, I would be happier. But every time I make that decision, I actually do worse […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam, How many times do I have to ask why I, as a good Christian, continue to be depressed even though I know that God has secured me and that he is sufficient for me.  I believe this with all my heart, and I work at getting my eyes […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam,    How can you tell if you should drop a friend who you feel is going in the wrong direction? I want to help this person, but I obviously can’t control him, and it seems like I’m hitting my head against a brick wall. Are Christians supposed to hang […] [READ MORE]

Dear Sam, My mother died three years ago, and ever since, my dad has called me for every little thing. He has a problem with loneliness, transportation, appointment-making, grocery-shopping, cooking, cleaning - you get the picture. I’ve tried saying “no”, but he’s so good at making me feel guilty that itrsquo;s […] [READ MORE]